To the Girl with “No Friends”

Hi There Beautiful,

As we begin to grow up and our lives begin to change, we notice that people come and go from our lives. From high school to college to post-college, our friends change. People walk out of our lives for various reasons, some unknown reasons.

For the past couple of years, I have struggled with trying to find a friend group. I couldn’t understand why I didn’t have many friends.

I have friends, of course. But, I feel I have never had a friend group that hangs out all the time. I have many friends but they are not one group of people. I’ll grab coffee with one, workout with the other and so on. It’s not like we all hang out at once. They come from various backgrounds.

Recently, I had two people walk out of my life for almost no reason. One girl said that I was too busy and didn’t make time for her, and the other straight up ditched me and gave no explanation. She completely ignored my texts.

Okay, I must be crazy!? Why did this just happen…

Well, as I always say, your vibe attracts your tribe. It also repels those who do not belong in your tribe. We can’t forget that it works in both ways. People are going to come and go in your life, but the real friends stick around. They don’t walk away just because you get busy.

Understand that life isn’t always about having a big friend group. It’s about surrounding yourself with genuinely good people who lift you up and support your dreams. As I said, the friends I do have come from various backgrounds. This makes my friends very dynamic. They each offer me something different. One inspires me to keep working toward my dreams because she is relentlessly working towards hers and she understands the hustle. Another is already kicking ass and she offers me so much motivation and wisdom.

Friend groups aren’t bad, but having less is sometimes more. Managing lots of friends can make you very stressed when you are hustling to make your dreams a reality and working hard everyday. When the timing is right, lots of friends will come into your life. When you need time to build yourself, your energy will weed out the ones who don’t understand that.

Just trust the process, and believe that everything happens for a reason. The people that walk away from you are not meant to be a part of your journey. We learn from those who come into our lives and we learn even more when they leave.

Understand that you don’t have to have a bunch of friends. 4 quarters are better than 100 pennies, remember that. You want to make valuable connections and you cannot do that when you are trying to nurture 100 different people.

Make an effort to be a good friend, invest in people and make meaningful connections; but don’t ever force a relationship that’s not meant to be. I’m learning to be a better friend, and I think we all are working on this. Be positive and confident, your vibes will guide you to the right people.

Thank you for reading PYM today!

Stay close to people who feel like sunlight.

xo, Lyss

 

2 thoughts on “To the Girl with “No Friends”

  1. WOW! Alyssa, this is all so true. You are an amazing writer and friend. You are in the hustle of your life right now, but it will pay off in a big way, and you already get it and going after it. God sends people to cross our path for reasons only he knows.Each is a lesson. Love this, another great post. Keep em’ coming.

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