Why Girls Need Self-Love?

Hello Pretty People,

The new year has arrived and that means everyone is creating new intentions + goals. If you read my last post, you know what mine are. On NYE, I realized another concept we all need to adopt in 2018 – GIRLS SUPPORTING GIRLS. Girls need to not only show more self-love in the new year but they need to show more support for one another.

Girls tend to judge other girls quite easily because we are taught by society to compete with each other. Rather than saying “you go girl!”, we sometimes get defensive about good looking women. This also happens with success. When we see a girl doing all the things we dream of, we can easily judge them. This not only feeds the jealousy trait inside us but it makes us more insecure about ourselves. We too often compare ourselves to those around us, rather than just embracing who we are.

If another girl is beautiful, we do not need to get insecure about our own beauty. Another’s beauty or success does not dampen our own. We are all beautiful and successful in our own ways.

What does this have to do with self-love?

Well, when girls are insecure about themselves, they tend to resort to this judgmental attitude. Judging other girls is a defense mechanism that makes us feel better about ourselves. When we feel threatened by other women, we tend to become judgmental towards them. This is an unhealthy habit because it not only creates negative vibes around us, but it also doesn’t allow us to give certain people a chance in our life. This a perfect example of judging a book by it’s cover.

Self-love allows us to become more comfortable and confident in ourselves. Self-love teaches us our strengths and our weaknesses. We know where we shine and where we can use a little more work. We believe in our abilities and we are fearless in the pursuit of our dreams. When we love ourselves, we don’t allow room for negativity and judgment. When we dwell on the beauty or success of another, we only create more room for negativity to thrive.

In my opinion, self-love is the constant practice of becoming your best self. You are confident in who you are, which allows you to spread more positivity and kindness to others. Insecurity and worry creates anxious tendencies, trust me I know. We fear others will outshine us or their light will dull our own. This, however, is not the case.

Falling in love with yourself is the key to falling in love with others. Being confident in who you are allows you to empower others to do the same. Self-love is needed more than ever amongst females. We need to worry less about being good enough for everyone else, and ask ourselves who is good enough for us.

Women have it tough sometimes; we have grown up in a society that teaches us to compete rather than to uplift one another. We’re not born to compete with one another. We need to realize that one girls beauty or success does not impact our own. Actually, empowering other women around us creates less girl hate and more confidence within ourselves.

My Lesson

Before you judge the girls around you, take a step back to realize you do not know their story. Judging someone else only brings negativity into your life and takes up space where good stuff could live. When women support each other and lift each other up, we become more powerful. We start to worry less about competing and more about creating our own life. We need to focus our energy on healing and creating, rather than worrying and judging. Support the women around you and empower them to be great!

In 2018, start practicing and adopting this intention to support the women around you. Understand that their success does not inhibit your own, and you too are beautiful. 2018 is the year of self-love, the year to spread kindness and love to all.

Thank you for reading PYM. Happy New Year to all my lovely readers! I wish you the best in 2018 and I hope you are able to grow in many new ways.

xo, Lyss

                  Favorite quote of all time!

2017 Reflection + 2018 Goals

Hello Beautiful Souls,

The new year is upon us; goodbye 2017, hello 2018!

Just like most, I take the last few days of the year to reflect on the past 365 days and think about what’s to come in the next 365. This past year, my anxiety was worse than it’s ever been. My strength was challenged many times and all in all, I experienced a lot of self-growth. The year was filled with new opportunities, love, adventure and many obstacles (nothing I couldn’t handle). So, let’s reflect on the lessons learned in 2017.

2017 Reflection

Self-Aware:

First lesson of 2017 is my realization of how self-aware I am. I know who I am, I know my flaws and I’m not changing that for anyone. My self-awareness actually roots from having anxiety. Being anxious and overthinking all aspects of my life has allowed me to become a very self-aware person. I know what my weaknesses are, I know my authentic self and I know what triggers my anxious habits. Although anxiety is often a stressor is my life, there is some beauty to it. Being self-aware not only helps me with coping and conflict-resolution, but it also helps me read other people really well. This is one of my favorite lessons from the year!

Healthy Living:

Another major lesson from the past year is learning what it actually means to be “healthy”. I’ve been an athlete my whole life and I always thought I had a grasp on what it means to be healthy. This year, however, I learned that healthy is more than hitting the gym and eating a salad. Eating clean and fresh foods is super important not only to you physical health but also your mental health. It can also impact your skin.

I also learned that every body is different; heavy weight lifting may be the perfect regimen for some whereas pilates/toning may be perfect for others. Learning to mix up your workouts and try different things helped me understand my body and how it responds. Don’t be afraid to try something new!

Forgiveness:

This year I had to really learn to forgive and forget. Life is short and holding on to BS that only weighs you down is unnecessary. Getting hurt by people you love and trust the most can be hard but if you hold onto these negative energies it will only make you spiral out of control. Being an anxious person, I tend to overthink these situations way too much. Months after someone has hurt me or angered me, I can still question myself and say “why?”. When really, there is no answer and I need to move on. Forgive & forget. You have to learn what battles are important and which ones are not.

Sometimes we must allow those around us to make their own mistakes in order to learn who they are. Even if we get hurt, everyone is on their own journey and we must understand our growing periods are all different. Learn when to forgive people and let them go or when to forgive them and allow them a second chance. Not everyone deserves a second chance but some people are still learning.

Life is just life:

My last lesson/reflection of 2017 is that life is just life, and what I mean by that is life isn’t so serious. Yes, set goals and work hard towards them. Take things serious if it is important to you or your goals, but don’t forget that it’s just life. Truth is, no one knows what the hell they are doing. We are all just following this societal standard, or maybe our own standards, but we’re all just trying to figure it out. Don’t take things so serious! Just focus on the things that make you happy and do that, everyday.


Contrary to typical new year goals, I wanted to share concepts/habits I want to work on in the new year. Yes, I will set some smaller goals periodically throughout the year to pinpoint some of these concepts, but this is my general direction for 2018.

2018 Goals

More Self-Love: 

By self-love, I mean I want to work on being more confident in myself and knowing my own worth. As I begin to enter a really crucial period of my life, I need to start believing in myself 110% because if I can’t take myself seriously, why should anyone else? I have mentioned in previous posts that self-love is more than confidence or just knowing your worth, it’s also about self-help. During 2016, I became very confident in myself but over the duration of 2017, I found that I lost some of this badass “B” vibe because of my anxiety. I let little things bother me and I started to doubt myself. That’s why self-love is one of my first goals for 2018. This year will be about becoming the badass girl I know I am and not letting anyone knock that.

Be Happy + Healthy:

I already worked toward this one in 2017, but I experienced some low points in the last half of the year, which caused some setbacks. Therefore, I want to make my health and wellness a big focus for 2018. As I learned in 2017, healthy eating and physical activity not only improves mood and energy, but it helps my overall health. This is super important for all aspects of my life, so it’s time to kick it into high gear. 2018 will be the year of my best self!

Build a relationship with my anxiety:

My last goal for the new year is to work on building a relationship with my anxiety. Anxiety is something I have struggled with most of my life, but this past year has been the worst for me. Instead of letting it define me though, I want to work alongside it. I learned through my yoga and meditation practice that anxiety is not something you “get rid of”, it’s always going to be there. When you try to get rid of it, it can actually cause more stress and anxiety. The best way to win the anxiety battle is by learning to live with it. That’s why I started yoga and meditation. The breathing techniques learned in the practice help me cope with my anxiety.

This is my first step toward building this healthy relationship with it and I hope to continue working on it in the new year. I will not let the negative side of anxiety to win.

Although I love taking any opportunity to set new goals and refocus my energy on the things that matter, you should start your new year resolutions now. There is no better time than now! I know people knock on the concept of setting goals and “new year, new you” but if that’s what motivates you to start crushing your goals, so be it. Don’t let the thoughts of others hold you back.

Thank you for checking out my year in review and my goals for the new year. Feel free to share yours in the comments below! I hope the end of 2017 is amazing and I wish you the best in 2018. Happy New Year, beautiful human!

xo, Lyss