Darling, You Should Just Go for It.

Hello Babes,

Before Thanksgiving, I applied for this really amazing job opportunity at a local boutique. The position entailed styling, merchandising, blogging, fashion…basically all things I love. I thought this job would be perfect for me. At first, I was hesitant to apply because I am only 21 and the job required many diverse skills. I wondered if I would just be overlooked. However, I preceded and applied.

I was offered an interview, which lead to a second interview. I was beyond thrilled to have this opportunity in front of me. It made my heart so happy. Lately, I have been feeling a little lost on my career path. As graduation draws closer for me, I wonder where I even want to be. I love fashion and I want to make an impact in my job, but where and what does that mean for my career?

So, these feelings of who I want to be have been swirling in my mind. I get hectic and wonder if I’m doing too much or maybe too little. Am I behind? This kind of mindset has made me feel a little burnt out and very uninspired. That’s why this job opportunity has really sparked the flame in my soul. It almost seemed too good to be true, everything about it was just ideal for what I love and what I want to do.

This week I received the news that I got the job. I haven’t been this excited and happy in quite awhile. My glass is overflowing with gratitude. This opportunity is what inspired my last post about manifesting positive thoughts. I envisioned myself in this position and I thought positively about receiving the job, and I truly felt as though this helped me achieve this goal. That’s why I write this post, in connection with How to Manifest Positive Thoughts.

Darling, just f*cking go for it.

There is a bracelet in the boutique that says this. I looked at it while I was in the store officially accepting the job, and although it is slightly vulgar language, I LOVED it.

As I said, I was weary of applying for the position when I first saw the posting because I figured I was not going to be good enough. However, I was exactly what the owner was looking for. This isn’t a post to toot my own horn, it’s to tell you to just f’ing go for it. Whatever you’re sort of, kind of thinking about doing – JUST DO IT. (Not endorsed by Nike)

Commit to making the decision to try. Taking the first step is the hardest part. The worst thing that will happen is you’ll be told no, but at least you tried. Failing is better than not trying at all. Through failure you learn more about yourself and more about where you’re supposed to be. Don’t take failure as something personal, it could just be a sign from the universe that you don’t belong there. Don’t doubt your abilities until you try.

Y’all know I’m a girl of many quotes, so in relation to this post, I found a quote that reads “One life. Just one. Why aren’t we running like we are on fire towards our wildest dreams?

For real, why not?

You get one life to make completely your own, so why not take the chance to do something great. Your life is a blank canvas and the paths you take create the art that covers that canvas. Making the decision to go big and just try will change your life. In order to make the life you want, you must make the decision to try, and even possibly fail. As always, I am constantly working on my own stuff too. Of course I still get caught up in the rules of the world, but don’t forget you’re life is completely up to you. Remembering this helps keep me grounded.

I just wanted to share my own experience to bring attention to how often we doubt ourselves when really we can achieve so much greatness if we allowed ourselves to take the necessary risks. It’s easier, and almost more comfortable, to just say we can’t do something. But think about all the things you could do, if you gave yourself the chance. Stop wasting time worrying about the “what if’s” and just f*cking go for it. You deserve greatness!

As always, thank you for reading PYM.

xo, Lyss

Are You Busy or Productive?

Hello Happy Souls,

As the end of the semester nears, I can’t help but feel a little pressure and stress. Deadlines are approaching and time is ticking. For some, graduation is only a few weeks away. Although these times are very exciting, they can be very exhausting as well. I’ve noticed myself feeling mentally exhausted, and sometimes physically fatigued as well.

I’m learning that some of this exhaustion comes from my anxiety and thinking way too much. But, I’m also seeing that I feel overwhelmingly “busy”. I cannot seem to balance things, why is it so tough?

Well, there is a difference between being busy and being productive. There are many times when we become stressed out because we are overwhelmed with things. Some things that should not stress us out. Things that are not benefiting us or adding value to our lives. Things that are stressful and annoying to us. This is being busy. Busy is unhealthy.

Being productive means you move with intention. Each of your actions throughout the day are intentional. You are mindful of what you are doing and you are present in the moment. Plan your day but allow yourself to go with the flow. You are able accomplish big and small tasks. This is productive.

Can you think of where this relates in your own life? Ask yourself, are you busy or productive?

I know that I have been way more busy than productive lately. It has killed my creativity, slowed my motivation and spiked my anxiety. Being productive makes your day feel more accomplished and valuable.

I’ve started to attend a yoga class to help lower my stress and combat my anxious feelings. During one of the classes, the instructor said something that really resonated with me. She was talking about how so many people say they do not partake in yoga because they don’t have the time. This made me recall all the times I have said I don’t have time for things like exercise, yoga or meditation. Then, she said that after they started the practice (yoga), they found they were actually wasting a lot of their time watching Netflix or being on social media.

This made me step back from what I was doing with my life to evaluate what things that are heavy and wasting my time versus what things are adding value to my life and bringing me joy. I quickly realized that I do not have time for things that bring me stress. Of course there will always be day-to-day, unavoidable life stressors, but any extra stress must be removed.

For me, personally, stress only negatively impacts my health and mental state. It makes me very overwhelmed; therefore, I must do things that are meaningful and intentional or I become busy.

Once again, there are going to be stresses in life we cannot stop from happening, however, removing the ones we can control only creates more room for positivity. This is my point. You can choose to be busy with tasks that stress you out or you can choose to be productive with tasks that motivate you.

My Challenge for You:

If you are reading this post today, I challenge you to make a list of you daily activities. Anything from Netflix bingeing to reading a book. Then, examine what items on your list may be bringing negative stress in to your life.

  • Can you remove something?
  • Is there something you’ve been wanting to do but haven’t had the “time”?
  • Are you motivated to finish your current to-do list?
  • Are you making time for yourself?

These are just a few of the things I have asked myself lately. These questions have made me understand my current situation and where I need some auditing in my routine. I’ve been wanting to start yoga and meditation for over 3 years now, and now I’ve finally started. I dropped the BS and figured out what was needed in my life.

Challenge yourself to start something new, and do it for yourself. Try something that scares you! It’s okay to let go of anything that no longer suits you. Remove negative stress and add more positive stuff. Understand that this is your life and it’s yours to make. Tomorrow is not promised, so why live in the future. I am learning that living in a future mindset creates anxiety and stress. Enjoy the present moments of your life. Start making decisions for yourself and start doing the things you want.

I hope you can realize some of your own stressors after reading this post and begin thinking about where you could make changes. Thank you for reading PYM. Stay on the look out for the December newsletter coming out next week. If you want to subscribe, you can do so on the right of this page.

xo, Lyss

Patience, A Key to Success

Hello Beautiful People,

Patience… If I’m being honest, this is something I lack. I’m always expecting things to happen fast, no time wasted. When in reality, this is not realistic. I’m working on that though. I’ve always believed everything happens for a reason and it will all make sense at some point, but then the whole impatient thing gets in the way.

When something negative happens, I can sometimes react as if it’s the end of the world. Some of this roots from my anxiety, some of it roots from my ambition. Being ambitious and driven is great, but so is being patient. Too many times I get discouraged because something exciting and great isn’t happening right now. I always have an urge to be doing something big.

The past few months have been a roller coaster for me, in all honesty. I try to stay positive and patient but then I’m so easily knocked back to the trenches.

“Ugh, why can’t I shake this feeling!”

The answer is not only in patience but also in perspective. Yes, negative things have happened in my life lately but not everyday has been negative. Also, there are people out there who have it way worse than me. That doesn’t change how I feel, but it can at least change my perspective.

What’s My Point?

My point is that in life, the things we want will not occur over night. We too often look at successful people and think “they’re lucky, they reached success overnight”. When this is far from the truth. Successful people are the ones who have endured the ultimate struggles and challenges in life. They are the ones who have been patient with the process and actually enjoyed the process of growth.

These periods of negativity can get us down, but they also guide us to where we need to go. If life was always perfect and always happening, we would never appreciate the successes. Patience is what teaches us appreciation for not only the successful moments but also the rough moments. The ones that got us to where we are today.

As a college student in my final year, there is more pressure to figure my life out RIGHT NOW than ever before. Yes, I should get an idea of where and who I want to be, but I shouldn’t put so much pressure on myself that it ruins present moments.

I think this is something a lot of college students experience at this time, especially close to the holidays. We all want to be able to tell Aunt Sally about the all jobs we have lined up and the person we are going to marry, but it’s just not realistic. We need patience.

I need patience. I need to calm the F down and realize everything will work out. Although I say I believe “everything happens for a reason”, I still lack patience sometimes.

I may sound like a hypocrite, and you may be wondering why you’re even listening to me. But, here is why:

I get it. I’m in it. I know you’ve been there too! We all get impatient with life from time to time. We want our dream job now, we want to travel now, we want everything NOW. Perhaps this what our generation has come to; we’ve become use to the fact that we can access people and information at any given time. While this is all true, we must stop to realize that life doesn’t work like the internet.

Our dream jobs won’t happen for 10+ years probably, and our travels will be unknown, not planned. If you’re able to achieve any of these goals quickly, good for you. If not, you’re not doing something wrong. Life moves at different paces for everyone. The successes of others do not have to dampen yours, in fact they do not dampen yours at all. Your success is up to you; it’s about the hard work and patience you put in to achieve it.

Back to why you are listening to me, I am seeing this first hand. I see it in myself and I see it in the students I’m around everyday. We all think we have to have it figured out right now. We don’t. Life is short, but it’s also so long. It will go by fast but doors will continue to open for you along the way. Don’t let fear of timing ruin your dreams.

I write this today because I have felt so much anxiety and pressure to have it all figured out this semester, so much so that I have depleted my own creativity and goals. I have seen the stress that impatience has caused me. After meeting new friends and listening to everyones story, I am learning I am not alone in my struggle. I’m learning that no one has it together, not even the professionals.

This worry and fear has only prohibited me from achieving my full happy-self. It’s impacted my health and my sleep patterns. We are energized by our passions. Don’t let stress be the thing to kill that energy. Healthy stress is good, it propels us towards our goals. Anxious, worry stress is not. It ruins our goals.

Stay focused, remain patient and enjoy the process. Do things that make you happy. Spend time with those who lift you up. Network with new people because you want to not because you feel like you have to. Step out of your comfort zone. Visit new cities and explore new talents. Dare I say, experience struggle. These are the things that will teach you patience and strength.

These skills will make you most successful, not more school work or another internship. If you can passionately express your experiences and true self to an employer that will be more beneficial. If you live your life shamelessly and authentically, then you will find peace and happiness. The destination you desire is amazing, but the process is the fun part.

Thank you for reading PYM today. I have started a monthly newsletter from Pretty, Young & Motivated, you can subscribe by sharing your email in the box on the right of the page. This newsletter will contain a round up of monthly posts, blog announcements, positive quotes, books and blogs to read, and more! Lastly, I am working on a huge fashion post, so stay tuned for that.

xo, Lyss

Rebuilding Your Self-Confidence

Confidence

Hello Beautiful Souls,

Some of you may have heard my personal self-confidence rebuild story in earlier posts, but if not I will share it again.

Lots of people will ask me what my blog is about and why I started it. Well, I actually started my blog out under the name Somewhere Between Vogue & Van Gogh. It was mostly directed toward art and fashion. But, after undergoing some major changes in my life, it not longer suited me. It was also a super long name that no one could remember.

I was a collegiate cheerleader for almost 2 years. For those of you who do not know, I ended up quitting because it was becoming a toxic environment for me. This is the place where my self-confidence got absolutely destroyed.

Comments and jokes about my size started to get to me mentally. Being on a co-ed team, there was this stigma that the girls had to be less than 110 pounds to stunt. I only weighed 10 pounds more than that but I was constantly looked over, and I was told the “smaller” girls were just easier to stunt with. This stigma caused me to become unhealthy, mentally and physically.

After I finally made the decision to quit, the rebuilding of my confidence began. I spent the next few months after that focusing on my goals; one of which was studying abroad. This time period was a weird point in my life. I wan neither sad nor happy. It was just this time of finding who I wanted to be without cheerleading. I had been a cheerleader for almost 9 years.

My A-ha Moment

Anyways, summer 2016 arrived and I left for my study abroad trip in France. I spent almost 6 weeks fully immersed in the French culture. This is where I began to find my confidence again. The funny part is I didn’t find my confidence through looks or attention, I found it on the outside of my comfort zone. I found that when I pushed my limits to try something new and exciting, I was rewarded with a little confidence point, as I like to call it.

I don’t know why these things correlated, but I think when we are able to try new things we learn more about ourselves.

I’ve also never been one to wear heavy make up, but in the states, I wore an average amount. In Nice, one of the cities I lived in for almost 4 weeks, it was too hot to worry about make up. We were constantly walking, climbing stairs or on the beach. Make up was not necessary.

I also left my hair natural most days because I was nervous about ruining my hair tools. I am sharing these points because this was actually a freeing experience for me. My host mom constantly complimented my smile and my appearance, which made me realize that beauty is more than trying to look perfect. Beauty can also come from the light your personality shines.

Back to the comfort zone thing, I always feel this internal spark when I do something new or step out of comfort zone. That gut feeling we get about things, listen to it. If you are inclined to try something, you should go for it. (Unless it is harmful to others, then don’t…)

After regaining my confidence, some of the girls on the trip encouraged me to write a book about being confident and empowering girls to do the same. It sounded like a great idea, and maybe I will one day, but instead my blog came to mind. After returning back to the U.S., I started brainstorming a new image for my blog. I wanted to share my story with other girls. I wanted to inspire girls to become their best self and empower them to encourage other girls to do the same.

This is how Pretty, Young & Motivated was born.


Okay, so how do you rebuild your confidence?

Take a moment to notice your successes

No matter what you are currently working on, successful or not, take time to realize how far you’ve come. When you have self-doubt, imagine a time you were successful. You can even celebrate a small win. This practice will allow you to understand success and confidence are a process. You will reach your goals in due time.

Confidence often roots from these successful points in our lives. They spark that internal flame a little and boost your confidence. I think this happens because as humans, we are so quick to doubt our abilities and when we are actually successful in our actions, we surprise ourselves. This feeling propels us to believe in ourselves, and that’s really all confidence is. It’s believing in yourself and your abilities.

Listen to your intuition

Follow your gut. Referring to the point about believing in ourselves, most of the time we believe in ourselves but our minds tell us otherwise. This belief is that gut feeling. You know what you are capable of and that can sometimes scare the shit out of you. Check in with those successes and keep following your intuition, it knows what you truly want.

When you follow that feeling, it usually leads to successful actions or fulfilling feelings. As they say at Nike, just do it.

Realize your beauty, internally

Once again, beauty is not just appearance. You can be the most externally beautiful person in the world but if you are a terrible person on the inside, it will show. It’s like the old saying “jealousy is an ugly trait”. They don’t say that because being jealous makes you physically ugly, but because it makes you an ugly person internally.

Know your worth beyond physical appearance. Yes, we all like to look pretty or handsome, but being a good person is most important. Your beauty comes from your strengths within, and sometimes even our weaknesses make us beautiful. The most vulnerable people are usually the most beautiful. Become self-aware; knowing who you are will make you more confident.


These are my best tips for rebuilding self-confidence. There is a huge confidence gap between men and women today. Ladies, we need to close this gap by believing in ourselves more and inspiring other women to do the same. We rise together, and we fall together.

Work on rebuilding your own confidence, and then work on building up the other women around you. Together we are stronger. If you are a male who struggles with confidence, you can still follow these tips to become more confident.

The bottom line is that, like everything in life, rebuilding confidence is a process. You have to fully believe in yourself, which can take some time to do. From there it is up to you to make decisions you believe in, decisions that spark that gut feeling. Finally, never stop pushing outside of your comfort zone. You will become more self-aware and gain a deeper understanding of your strengths and weaknesses. As always, trust the process!

Thank you for reading PYM. I hope to see you back again soon.

xo, Lyss

Pumpkin Patch Proof Outfit for Fall

 

Fall Date

Hello Babes,

Today I am trying something a little different on PYM. I wanted to share an outfit idea with all of you. It’s been quite awhile since I’ve shared a fashion post with you, and I wanted to test it out again. So, if you like this style post and would like to see more fashion/style posts from me, please let me know!

My blog started on fashion, and I still love dressing up and skimming Vogue magazines. I just have found more passion and engagement in writing about real life stuff. I always strive to share authentic topics and stories with you gals. However, I’m happy to bring back the fashion piece if I see enough push back.

This outfit is super simple and easy for almost anyone to put together.

Fall Outfit

American Eagle Boyfriend Flannel // American Eagle Dark Wash Jeans // Boutique Booties // Tart Hat // Assorted Kate Spade Bracelets

My boyfriend, David, and I visited a local farm last Saturday to pick pumpkins. We got donuts, picked out our massive pumpkins, took fun photos and then carved the pumpkins. The weather was perfect, and this outfit was very versatile for the day.

This outfit can easily be to put together from any closet. You can make it your own with different accessories. I paired mine with this cute grey hat! Depending on the weather, a chunky blanket scarf may be suitable.

The secret to my outfit is that it does not have to be name brand. I prefer American Eagle denim but you can wear your favorite pair of jeans with this outfit. A flannel can be bought at any store you please, even a resale shop. Don’t limit yourself to high priced fashion items, it’s all about how you style something that matters.

I hope you enjoyed this post, and if you would like to see more fashion post, please let me know. Thank you for reading today!

“Forget the rules. If you like it, wear it”

xo, Lyss